The Gift of Pain

I read a book a while back called “The Gift of Pain” and I wanted to share the inspiration I got from it and from something else I read recently.  I do this because I know a lot of people who are currently mourning something—the election and what it means for the future, the loss of a dream, the loss of a friendship, the loss of a loved one, the loss of health, among other things.

I witness peoples’ pain everyday in my work and it can overwhelm if I let it.  But I don’t.  Because I know it’s a gift.  It’s a gift not only to witness someone’s pain but especially to help them transform it.   Humans are really good at creating meaning and growing and learning from our pain.  This self healing is actually a natural process and it is only stunted when something gets in the way.  If we opened ourselves to the gift in the pain—to find meaning and purpose in what we are going through, it suddenly poofs into something much more manageable.

There is a flip side to pain.  See if you can find it in your own.  For example, the pain many people are experiencing due to the national election results really mean a lot of people are dedicated to tolerance, acceptance, fairness, inclusion, kindness and love.  Hold tight to that!  Hold tight to the flip side!

One writer I like is from a blog called “The Hands Free Revolution” and she says this about the ‘flip side’: “On the flip side of disappointment is desire—desire to create a different outcome next time. On the flip side of letdown is belief—belief that your story is far from over. On the flip side of pain is strength—strength you didn’t know you had until you had to dig deep to find it. On the flip side of hurt is gratitude—gratitude for those who love you and stand by you in your pain. On the other flip of despair is connection—connection that comes from recognizing a familiar look of pain in someone else’s eyes and reaching out your hand. When we give PAIN a PURPOSE by using it to enlighten, comfort, educate, create, or inspire, we can’t help but appreciate who we are now—a stronger, wiser, more compassionate version of who we used to be.  Why would we want to look back?”

Pain gives us opportunity—to connect with others and grow ourselves into better selves.  Growing pains are real.  They hurt.  That hurt can and should be shared as a path to making peace with it.  But making peace with it is essential.  This is not the same as ‘giving up’ or ‘giving in’.  Making peace means seeing the opportunity for growth and purpose.  What is the gift in your pain?

I’m in transition now as I travel for 1 1/2 years.  I don’t know what my next transition will bring but I know one thing for sure:  I will be playing.

I will be playing with the pain of endings, the uncertainty of new beginnings, and certainly just plain playing—in the sea for sure, on the land in new places and hopefully with new friends.

I will be seeking out dolphins and whales to inspire me along the way as I create retreats for reclaiming joy, as well as new sources of cacao!

I hope you will join me on my journey and transform your own pain.  Play with it as much as you can.  If you need help in how to transform it, I am still available to help.

In addition, I will be creating the blog about my travels that I have been meaning to start for years.  Now’s the time.  Contact me to be kept informed and you can also follow me on my Facebook pages.  and

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